Golmaal Returns is probably one of the most awaited films this year. And simply for one reason that Golmaal was a huge hit. Frankly I never liked the first part. There were too many gags, the comic timing was off and the dialogues fell flat at many places. So it was with a certain amount of reserve that I entered the auditorium for Golmaal Returns. Also two of my favourite actors Paresh Rawal and Sharman Joshi were missing from the sequel… It seemed like the director Rohit Shetty was simply trying to cash in on the success of his debut venture.

Twenty minutes into the film and I found myself laughing out loud. Golmmal Returns like its predecessor revolves around four men whose lives are inextricably intertwined. Gopal (Ajay Devgan) is married to Ekta (Kareena Kapoor ) who is a K-soap addict. She's convinced her husband is cheating on her. Tusshar Kapoor plays Ekta's dumb brother who's unable to speak. He survives by speaking gibberish and really funny gestures. At one point Gopal spends the night outside the house. But due to Ekta's suspicious temprament he can't tell her the truth. Unfortunately for him his worst enemy gets murdered that night. And as Gopal struggles to establish his innocence, the noose around his neck just seems to get tighter and tighter.

It's more than two years since Golmaal released and the director has taken his own time to emerge with the sequel. And a lot of effort has gone into the script. Essentially the film remains a comic caper but the timing is perfect. Every sequence is well scripted and tightly edited. So despite the fact that the 30 minutes of the film the director is just establishing the characters and their various personalities the film doesn't drag. Actually you keep waiting to see what is likely to happen next.

Tusshar deserves the credit

If Tusshar was good in Golmaal he is excellent in this film. He's back with his favourite dialogue 'Mayar Oot'. For those who haven't seen the first part they can figure out what it stands for. And thankfully the director has used it with a great deal of restraint so every time he utters this curse you find yourself laughing all over again.


But it's not just his stuttering dialogues. Since he can't speak he uses his whole body to convey emotions. And the expression in his eyes changes from minute to minute. In all probability Tusshar Kapoor will walk away with most of the awards for best performance in a comic role.

Kareena Kapoor looks very good in the film. And she succeeds in looking thin without looking haggard. And she manages to ooze sex appeal irrespective of what she is wearing. But her role itself is very limited so there's nothing much she can do in this film.

Shreyas Talpade is the new entrant instead of Sharman Joshi. And luckily his chemistry with the earlier trio Arshad Warsi, Ajay Devgan and Tusshar Kapoor clicks perfectly. They are all simply amazing.

Ajay Devgan is a very effective counterpart to Tusshar's effervescence and ebullience. And Arshad Warsi as the gleeful inspector is a sheer delight. Most of the kids in the audience start giggling the minute Arshad appears on screen.

Four men dressed in drag

There's one sequence where all four men appear dressed up as women. And unfortunately more often than not these sequences in Bollywood tend to be executed in a cheap and lewd fashion. There's a very fine dividing line between crass and vulgar. And the director does not cross this line. In fact seeing Arshad Warsi dressed up as a famous lead actress (I refuse to tell you the name) had me in splits of laughter.

The director has taken potshots at a few well-known directors such as Sanjay Bhansali and Aditya Chopra. There are a few jokes on films also particularly Saawariya, Tashan and Black. In fact Munni's character is a take-off on Rani Mukerji's role in Saawariya. But it's been done in good taste. Spoofs needn't always be loud in your face.

Long live the tattoos

Saif Ali Khan may or may not have his girlfriend's name tattooed on his arm. But even at this minute there are probably millions of girls carving their husbands/boyfriends would do the same. And the director has used this brilliantly in the opening sequence.

Why this film works!

A tight script and good comic timing help to maintain the pace. The film drags briefly before the interval but then it picks up again. And in the earlier films the characters were simple unsophisticated college dropouts. Here they are men of the world. They look good and they dress flashily. Which goes perfectly well with the storyline. Thankfully there has been no attempt to overload the film with songs even though the music is by pritam. In all probability the one dialogue 'Shaque what the f***! will be used for years after the film.

What doesn't work

The film has been shot almost entirely in India. And it's good that simple fun films do not need grand locations. But a little more thought could have been given to the locations. And a lot of sequences, which have been shot on sets, would work much better if they were shot on location. And the women are completely wasted. Especially Amrita Arora!
But the film makes you laugh…

Verdict: If you are in the mood to watch a harebrained comic caper this film is perfect Diwali viewing.

Rating: 3.5/5

Two years ago, Rohit Shetty came up with a breezy entertainer GOLMAAL, which, most people agree, is the capable director's finest work to date. The comic scenes hit the right notes and buttons. Perhaps, that must've prompted its producers [Shree Ashtavinayak] and Rohit to continue with the GOLMAAL series.

But GOLMAAL RETURNS treats the viewer like a nitwit, with zero brains. No-brainer laughathons have worked in the past and people have catapulted these films to 'must watch again and again' category. But GOLMAAL RETURNS is simply unbearable!

35 years ago, the Kiran Kumar - Radha Saluja comedy AAJ KI TAZAA KHABAR [1973] is the inspiration for GOLMAAL RETURNS. No issues with that, it's an interesting concept. But screenplay writer Yunus Sajawal makes a mincemeat of the material, so much so that your head starts aching after a point and you want to tear your hair in disgust.

Seriously, what was the writer thinking when he came up with a pathetic screenplay? And how did a talented director like Rohit Shetty agree to ride on it? And how could an accomplished actor like Ajay Devgan green signal this enterprise? Questions, questions, questions...

GOLMAAL RETURNS was never meant to be a thinking man's film, but the attitude is, no-brainer comedies have worked and this one will work too. To give the credit where it's due, a few jokes/sequences involving Tusshar and Shreyas do bring a smile on your face, but in the absence of a tight screenplay, the film falls like a pack of cards.

Final word? Golmaal hai bhai script golmaal hai!

Gopal [Ajay Devgan], who lives with his wife Ekta [Kareena Kapoor], sister Esha [Amrita Arora] and brother-in-law Lucky [Tusshar Kapoor], gets stuck in a yacht after saving an attractive woman Meera [Celina Jaitly] from some goons. Both end up spending the night on the yacht and when he comes home the next day, his painfully suspicious wife, who is also a hardcore fan of the saas-bahu serials, smell fish.

Gopal knows it's going to be hard to quell her suspicion, so he concocts a cock-and-bull story about having stayed the night with a fictitious friend called Anthony Gonsalves. Ekta refuses to buy his yarn and writes to Anthony [on a fictitious address given to her by Gopal], asking him to visit her.

Gopal convinces his junior at work, Laxman [Shreyas Talpade], to pretend to be Anthony. Everything goes according to plan till the real Anthony turns up.

If that isn't complication enough for Gopal, a dead body is discovered at the location where he had saved Meera. The Investigating Officer, Madhav [Arshad Warsi], who is Esha's boyfriend and also who cannot stand the sight of Gopal, learns that the latter had been missing from home that eventful night and begins checking on him.

A sequel carries the baggage of humungous expectations. And you definitely expect GOLMAAL RETURNS to be a step forward. The makers had thundered, "GOLMAAL RETURNS is bigger, it's better" and that raises the bar. But the film is such a put off.

Writer Yunus Sajawal takes an interesting premise, but instead of upgrading it, only downgrades it with lacklustre situations. The writing is so weak, so lifeless that after a point you sit motionless, looking at the goings-on mechanically, instead of being a participant.

A few sequences do entertain you, but they're few and far between. Not enough to camouflage the defects. In view of the fact that the writing is so weak, there's not much that director Rohit Shetty can do to save the ship from sinking. However, the dialogues are howlarious. Music is not as inspiring. 'Tha Karke' is the best track, while 'Tu Saala' [well promoted] isn't there in the film and 'Meow' comes during the end credits. And you're exasperated by then!

GOLMAAL RETURNS belongs to Tusshar Kapoor and Shreyas Talpade. Tusshar is terrific yet again, the real scene stealer, while Shreyas displays his comic side very well. Both, in fact, provide respite to the viewer. Ajay Devgan is likable. Kareena does the suspicious wife act well. Celina stays on your mind even after the show is over.

Arshad Warsi is relegated to the backseat. Amrita Arora is strictly okay. Anjana Sukhani gets no scope. Vrajesh Hirjee is alright. Sharat Saxena, Rakhi Vijan, Sanjay Mishra, Murli Sharma, Mukesh Tiwari and Ashwini Kalsekar fill in the blanks.

On the whole, there's tremendous curiosity to watch GOLMAAL RETURNS and the terrific promotion has only enhanced the excitement. But the film is a major letdown in terms of content. Barring a few jokes and gags, this GOLMAAL pales when compared to its first part. At the box-office, expect a terrific start for the film, but GOLMAAL RETURNS lacks the power to stand on its feet after the initial euphoria settles down.

First things first: Priyanka Chopra must thank Madhur Bhandarkar for a role that any actress would lay down her life for. As Meghna Mathur in Fashion, Priyanka may finally achieve the critical acclaim and commercial success she's dreamt of all along.

As for the film itself, Fashion is a story of a small-town girl, who aspires to be a supermodel. Propped by some resourceful and forever generous friends, she finds herself in Mumbai and soon begins to climb the vertiginous heights of success.

But like all good things in life, the achievements come with a hefty tag. And the meteoric rise of Meghna is soon offset by a near-fatal fall that leaves her scarred and bruised. Meghna's rise, fall and her eventual rise to the top again is what Fashion is all about.

Bhandarkar has been doing considerable research for his film. He has spared no efforts in getting some of the most experienced hands on board for the right feel. And in frame after frame the detailing, styling and the choice of the ensemble cast gives Fashion the realistic feel that is so important for a film of this genre.

The fashion shows are lavishly mounted and impeccably put together. The backstage frenzy is well captured, as is every gleam in the kohled eyes, the glitter of bronzed cleavages, tinkling of champagne flutes and even the clamour for the first row seats at fashion shows.

The ensemble cast includes a smattering of industry experts: there is veteran choreographer Achla Sachdev, designers Wendell Rodricks, Narendra Kumar Ahmed, Shane and Falguni Peacock and a host of other real-life professionals, including a bevy of the top models: Noyonika Chatterjee, Alecia Raut and Mugdha Godse, who plays Priyanka's friend Janet.

Of course, like in all Madhur Bhandarkar films there are several references to real life incidents in Fashion too.

Those in the know will smile at how Bhandarkar includes everything: from socialite Queenie Dhody's now-famous marital dispute to the great designer spat between Aki Narula and Suneet Varma.

Kangana's character Shonali bears a striking resemblance to the troubled model Geetanjali Nagpal, who was found begging on the city streets, after a professional and personal crisis. And yes, there is also the scene where Shonali has a wardrobe malfunction, just as Carol Gracias had during Fashion Week some time back.

Janet's liaison with a rich gay designer is also something that isn't too hard to find in this particular world. And indeed Priyanka Chopra's character too seems to be based on real life model Shivani Kapur – once the face of a cosmetic giant, now spending most of her time away from the glare of the arc lights.

'Don't think. You are a model'

Bhandarkar's Fashion is more about the models, the 'clothes hangers' as they are known. Often dismissed as bimbettes they earn the odd buck by appearing for page three dos and if they are good enough, get to walk the ramp for top designers.

The film captures the pathos and irony of these pretty girls, who are often talked down by designers with lines like "You are model. You are not supposed to think." It is a world where professional contracts have no-marriage, no pregnancy clauses, while brand ambassadors are often the victims of a rich man's whims.

Male models have the toughest time here – refusing to sleep with a gay designer would mean absolutely no chance to be seen anywhere near the ramp.

There is enough coke-snorting, cigarette smoking and drinking in the film to warrant an A-certification. And that's where maybe Madhur got a little too self-obsessed while trying to explore the dark side of this glitzy world. But what the heck… it works!

While the references could have been many, Bhandarkar does not get carried with 'reality' and thankfully does not come across as didactic. The fashion shows are pictured and styled very well (thanks to style consultant Rita Dhody) while certain scenes stand out for their masterful handling.

The interaction between Priyanka and Kangana in the ladies restroom, the first time Priyanka lights a cigarette and later when she realises she has slept with a complete stranger in a cheesy hotel, are just some examples.

A special mention for music directors Salim and Suleiman, whose haunting signature tune seems to have captured the essence of the film bang on.

For a change unlike most Bollywood films, Fashion belongs to the ladies. For nearly three hours they hold you in thrall. And the beauty is, while the film is about the sinfully glitzy world of fashion, none of the actresses have had to resort to titillation to hold your attention.

Kangana Ranaut has a relatively small role to play. But she's a key to the way Priyanka's character evolves in the second half and in that sense becomes significant. She plays a super successful model who has a very tragic personal life – an abusive boyfriend and colleagues who don't hesitate to backstab her. Kangana does a convincing job. But seeing her as the doped-out and self-destructive psychotic woman for the nth time puts you off. Probably it's time Kangana takes a break from playing these roles.

Mugdha Godse though is a revelation. She seems confident for a newcomer and has a great body too. Kitu Gidwani is chillingly real as the ruthless head of a modelling agency.

As for the men in Fashion, let's just say they're either gay or wimps. Now that's tad too much to handle, especially the gay bit. Arjan Bajwa is just about okay, while Arbaaz Khan as the owner of one the largest fashion houses also does a fairly interesting job. He plays the man who creates the phenomena of supermodel Meghna Mathur and then ruins her life.

And finally Priyanka Chopra – right from the very first scenes as the gauche small-town girl dressed in blingy clothes, inept at air kissing to the super confident and later super arrogant bi**h – is absolutely brilliant.

She uses her eyes eloquently – her small paunch notwithstanding – struts her stuff in designer heels quite well. Her transformation from the simple, awkward girl petrified of shooting for a lingerie ad to the drop dead gorgeous show stopper, gives you the goose pimples. Priyanka's portrayal of a woman who's headed for a fall because she cannot see the thin line between arrogance and attitude draws you to her. It helps also that the character she plays has been very well etched out. Meghna Mathur could well be your model-next-door whose inability to handle success, relationships and her life, is something many of us can relate to in some way or the other.

Her first sip of wine, her first flirtation or first seduction, her first lovemaking, her first puff of cigarette and her very first betrayal are all personal milestones that become yours too. And they all add up to the grand finale, when she steps out to the face the world again, rising from the ashes. Surely, the climax is riveting though it comes a little too late. Yet chances are you will find yourself giving Priyanka Chopra a standing ovation.

Having gushed enough about the film, here's the list of things that don't work: Madhur's obsession with poking fun at high society continues with digs at socialites, trophy wives and gay designers. A little maturity and sensitivity may have helped here.

The film is more about models than about fashion, really. It is not about the designers, the clothes or the creative process. In Madhur's world the designers are either gay or exploitative or both and of course quite like in Page Three almost all socialites are bad, sad and bitchy. What's more, Priyanka's friends are always 'too good', generous to a fault, making them a little unreal.

However at the end of it all Bhandarkar shows you how to make an absolutely kickass film without a single male lead. And that in itself calls for a celebration.

Verdict: Shut out the endless chatter about six-packs and eight-packs and coordinated stunts by 40-something actors. Fashion is an ode to women, beautiful women who can deliver a killer performance.

Rating: 3.5/5

Are you ready for an expose on the fashion industry? Where designers pass off 'Indira Market, Bangkok' stuff as their own creation. Where ad agency/fashion mag honchos call the shots. Wild lifestyles, backstage dramas, wardrobe malfunction, casting couch... ouch, ouch, ouch!

Madhur Bhandarkar, the undisputed king of realistic fares, comes up with yet another hard-hitting film that enlightens you, moves you, motivates and deflates you, even shocks and surprises you and of course, entertains you.

The solid reason why FASHION works is because Madhur brings alive everything you've read in newspapers or watched on TV as an outsider, to the big screen. And that works and how!

But let's not give the subject material all importance, for Madhur's handling of the subject is exemplary. Madhur dresses up his mannequins well, but most importantly, infuses life in those prime bodies. A number sequences leave you tongue-tied [more on that later].

But there's a hitch. And this problem tones down the impact considerably. The running tine of almost 2.40 hours makes you restless, especially the penultimate 25-odd minutes. Yet, all said and done, FASHION has all it takes to be the showstopper this Diwali!

FASHION tells the story of a small-town girl with a dream and the determination to make it a reality. Meghna [Priyanka Chopra] is ambitious, she wants to attain the status of a supermodel. She realises her dreams and rises to walk the ramps for leading designers across India.

But Meghna has to pay the price for her fame and her journey to the top. Her career starts sliding downwards. In this journey of Meghna, she encounters a number of people. Most importantly, Shonali [Kangna Ranaut] and Janet [Mugdha Godse]. Also, Abhijit Sareen [Arbaaz Khan], a tycoon who controls the fashion industry.

CHANDNI BAR, PAGE 3, SATTA, CORPORATE, TRAFFIC SIGNAL -- every Madhur Bhandarkar film has a new story to tell and he tells it most convincingly. In fact, Madhur strikes a fine balance between realism and entertainment in every film. Given the fact that FASHION is all about the fashion industry, the narrative is inevitably filled with lots of glam-n-glitz moments. The fashion shows, the stunning models, the superb styling, the vibrant colours and the behind the scenes drama is worth every penny spent on the ticket.

But it's not just ramp shows and style-n-fashion here. There's a story running concurrently -- of three models. One, the rise of an unknown into a supermodel. Two, the fall of a supermodel to dust. Three, the ambitious model not achieving success, but opting for a marriage of convenience.

While Madhur has handled the theme as if he were an insider, this review would be incomplete if you ignore two major sequences that are simply outstanding. One, Kangna's wardrobe malfunction and two, when Priyanka exposes Arbaaz to his wife [Suchitra Pillai].

Mahesh Limaye's cinematography captures every aspect of the fashion industry to the fullest. The screenplay [Madhur Bhandarkar, Anuradha Tiwari, Ajay Monga] is perfect, except for the penultimate portions. Niranjan Iyengar's dialogues are fantastic. Nitin Chandrakant Desai's production design is truly upmarket. The costumes and styling are top notch, a feast for the eyes. Salim-Sulaiman's music is well synchronised as well. 'Mar Jaava' and 'Jalwa' are lilting creations.

Madhur places immense trust on Priyanka and she is remarkable all through, more towards the second hour. Post AITRAAZ, FASHION is another medal that shines the brightest when you look at her body of work. But the real star is Kangna. Her role may not be as lengthy as that of Priyanka, but the actress pitches in an awesome performance. Her confidence at the very start is infectious and her overall performance deserves an ovation.

Mugdha Godse is, again, supremely confident. She has dum. Arbaaz Khan is first-rate. Arjan Bajwa does well. Harsh Chhaya, the gay designer, stands out with a realistic performance. Ashwin Mushran, Priyanka's confidante, is top notch. Samir Soni is good. Suchitra Pillai and Kittu Gidwani are effectual. Raj Babbar and Kiran Juneja are seasoned in such roles.

On the whole, FASHION has tremendous curiosity value and also shock value for the Indian audiences. Its subject -- the behind the scenes working and drama of the fashion industry -- is its USP. At the box-office, the pre-release hype and buzz will ensure a successful run for the film. Its business at multiplexes mainly should be bountiful. However, trimming the film will only help; not only will it enhance the film, but also its business. Must watch!

Tarun and Genelia are starring in Sasirekha Parinayam (working title) being directed by Krishnavamsi and produced by Sunkara Madhu Murali under Sri Kartikeya Entertainments banner. Krishnavamsi had already worked with Karthikeya Creations banner to give the superhit Khadgam.

The shooting of Sasirekha Parinayam is almost complete; some scenes are being shot at Rajahmundry, Vijayawada and surrounding areas. Vidyasagar scores music for the film.

The film has been conceptualised as a comedy-cum-family entertainer and sources say that it is inspired by the Hindi superhit romantic comedy Jab We Met. The makers have plans to release the film in time for the Dussera holidays.

She will be seen opposite Tarun in this Telugu film titled Sasirekha Parinayam

magine Salman Khan, Mithun Chakraborty and Sunny Deol in the same film. The three macho men of Bollywood symbolise a genre of paisa vasool potboilers that most hardcore Hindi film buffs have grown up on. So just the presence of these names on the hoardings was reason enough to check out Heroes. And as a bonus you have Preity Zinta, Bobby Deol, Dino Morea and the film's protagonists Sohail Khan and Vatsal Seth.

Two aspiring filmmakers decide to make an anti-army movie, justifying the youth's aversion towards the defence services. For their research they get hold of a few undelivered letters written by three soldiers during the Kargil War. These letters bring forth old stories of the dead soldiers and the pain their families went through long after the war was over. The question is: Which is greater? National pride or one's responsibility towards his family?

Heroes has an interesting premise that talks about life after war. And though it does fall into the trap of getting too jingoistic in parts (Hollywood does this much better than us), the patriotism is not as overstated as a JP Dutta film. On the face of it, Heroes is a regular war film but there is very little action. Believe it or not the film doesn't have a single death sequence. The director chooses to focus on the battle of emotions rather than guns and missiles. And he has assembled a super talented cast to execute his mission. Pity, the big names don’t come face to face too often in the film. Any fan will vouch for the fact that a lot of mediocre multi-starrers are fun just for the thrill of watching your favourite starts share screen space. Here the plot flows in an episodic manner much like Lajja and Yuva.

And the pick of the lot has to be the Salman Khan-Preity Zinta track set in Punjab. The two share fantastic chemistry and while Preity Zinta is a veteran at playing the Punjabi kudi it's Sallu who is the big surprise. Khan steps into the SRK-Akshay territory, playing the romantic Sardar to perfection. Just goes to show what an underutilised actor he is. Hopefully directors will stop making him jump around on screen and give write roles with more meat. His scene in the climax is sure to get a lot taalis.

The brothers from Himachal, Sunny and Bobby do what they do best. Shout, fight, drink and do the bhangra and give long speeches about their devotion towards each other. This track is straight out of a 90's Deol action flick and maybe in this effort to cater to Deols' loyal audience, the director loses out on a bit of the emotional quotient. But the ageing Deols are in fine form in their comfort zone. Watch Deol Sr single handedly take on a dozen goons in the club. It's a classic Sunny Deol moment.

Now after watching the first two stories you pretty know how the third one will unfold. It's only the relationship that changes. So father-son Mithun and Dino's supposedly heart wrenching conflict ends up as the weakest link in the film both in terms of pace and content. Mithun and Dino like all the other actors of the film do their best to rise above the dragging screenplay but with limited success.

The premier production house [Yash Raj Films] teams up with one of the biggest studios of West [Walt Disney Pictures] for an animation film. You expect this collaboration to yield incredible results. Animation movies like THE LION KING and SHREK have appealed to every strata of movie-going audience the world over. Although 'Made in India' animation films are making their way into our plexes, the results, most of the times, are amateurish.

But ROADSIDE ROMEO pulls it off. In terms of animation [Tata Elxsi/VCL], it's a step forward as compared to the other animation films. But there's a hitch: Hackneyed script [penned by debutante director Jugal Hansraj].

Films like LION KING or SHREK, even FINDING NEMO, worked because they were innovative concepts. They had interesting stories to tell. Plus, most importantly, they were rich in emotions. You'd laugh when they laughed, you'd cry when they cried, the writing was so effectual.

ROADSIDE ROMEO borrows from the masala films of 1980s. There's a hero, a heroine, the mandatory villain, plus love, problems, misunderstandings and conflict, but all's well that ends well. The story is predictable and worse, you don't feel for any of those characters you watch on screen.

Another factor that goes against the film is the fact that it lacks good music. Though the title track and also 'Chule Na' have been publicized, the impact is missing. Ideally, the makers should've gone ahead and incorporated the evergreen songs from their rich repertoire in this animation film. The kids would've loved it!

There's one more hiccup. Assuming that ROADSIDE ROMEO is mainly targeted at the kids, the dialogues by Charlie Anna, the villain who speaks in a South Indian accent, are difficult to decipher and comprehend [at times] even for adults. Imagine, how difficult it would be for the kids to grasp those lines.

Yet, despite the shortcomings, ROADSIDE ROMEO works because the second hour keeps you fairly engrossed. A few portions like the cat pretending to be the pretty Laila on a date with Charlie Anna is amazing. Also, the culmination, a straight lift from the by-now-famous train ending from D.D.L.J., is equally enjoyable.

The voice-overs are perfect. Saif [Romeo] and Kareena [Laila] were the right choices for the lead players. Tanaaz Currim [cat] and Sanjay Mishra [the villain's sidekick] stand out as well.

On the whole, it's thumbs up for animation, but thumbs down for scripting in ROADSIDE ROMEO. It might glimmer during the festive week, but this Romeo is unlikely to rule the hearts of kids or kids at heart.

Director: Jugal Hansraj

Cast: Kareena Kapoor (Laila), Saif Ali Khan (Romeo), Javed Jaffrey (Charlie Anna)

The least you expect from an animation film are likeable characters, but Roadside Romeo is full of characters you couldn't care less about. Except Charlie Anna that is, the film's main bad-guy - or bad-dog to be precise.

The protagonist Romeo is an anglicised, well-bred canine who suddenly finds himself on the streets one day when the family he lived with moves westwards. Unaccustomed to being bullied and unfamiliar with the harsh ways of the real world, Romeo finds it hard to come to terms with his new life, until he's welcomed into the fold by a bunch of fellow strays. It's love at first sight when he spots Laila, the smokin'-hot dancer doggie who performs at the local club. But problem is, to get to Laila, Romeo must first get past Charlie Anna, the Vito Corleone of the streets, who's got his own sights set on her.

Roadside Romeo is too busy, too crowded with Hindi-movie clichés and repeated flogging of moments from previous Yash Raj-hits to be even half-likeable.

Most successful animation is simple enough for even small children to easily identify with, but I don't see little kids being drawn to the film's key theme of wooing the neighborhood hottie; or being interested in its standard Hindi movie characters who spout filmi lines. To be honest it's not a particularly rewarding film for adults either - it's got a plot that's worn thin from over-use, and it tries to be too cute for its own good.

The worst disease an animation film can suffer from is boringness, and Roadside Romeo contracts that infection quite early on. Even though it's only ninety minutes in running time, the film feels like a half-dead horse plodding along laboriously. There's a sense of been-there-done-that that accompanies so many scenes in the film, you've literally lost track of how many times you've seen them play out in different films before - like Romeo training Charlie Anna to be cool, even the scene in which he saves Charlie's life and puts his own in jeopardy - it's all yesterday's news.

But in all fairness, the film does have a handful of clever ideas - like that sequence in which the strays are playing their favourite game of who can wake up the most humans by making the most noise in the street; or then the one in which the alley cat disguises herself as Laila and rejects Charlie Anna's advances. It's scenes like these that stand out and bring a smile to your face because they're smartly written and unpredictable. Of the voice talent, it's only Javed Jaffrey playing Charlie Anna who succeeds in creating a character who has a distinct personality. Saif Ali Khan and Kareena Kapoor who lend their voices to Romeo and Laila respectively, play it fairly straight and fail to give any edge to either character.

The animation in Roadside Romeo may be fairly simplistic, pitted against Pixar gems like Ratatouille and Wall-E most recently, but that's not even what hurts the film most. It's the lifeless script and its across-the-board uninteresting characters that are its biggest failing.

In the end, it's difficult to determine exactly who the film was made for.

Because it doesn't succeed in creating an exciting world where indeed every dog has its day, I'll go with one out of five for director Jugal Hansraj's Roadside Romeo. Go armed with a lot of patience and a comfortable pillow.

Rating: 1 / 5 (Poor)

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